New Years Peeve
New Years Eve always seems to have an edge of angst to it. At least, it does for me.
There is this pressure to find something to do and the right people to do it with. By now you’re sick of your family and you can’t possibly fit in another food marathon. All of your alcoholic friends seem to have dispersed and that one friend who can usually be counted on to wrangle the troops is overseas.
If you have bearable siblings, you could hang with them, but then again, your younger brother did claim he “ordered you a Christmas present online and it didn’t arrive on time”, only to mysteriously appear the morning after Boxing Day sales.
Once you’ve sifted through your options and made a decision on what could be at best an orgasm with someone you'll never have to see again and at worst a missing phone, and empty bank account and a public urination fine you then need to dream up a resolution. Depending how far out you are this could mean spending the remainder of 2017 stressing about how you're going to compensate for said impending life changes. No more dairy? Better smash three packets of Tim Tams, a tub of Ben and Jerry's and a protein shake with Baileys. No more swearing? Better graffiti every public toilet in a 5km radius. Be more tolerant of people? Better not leave the house.
Something else to take into consideration is the state in which you are making these new, existential life choices. You’ve been on the brink of alcoholism and food addiction for days, you’re not exactly thinking straight (or at all), and there seems no immediate escape from the festivities. Even if you wanted to make some rational commitments for 2018, it would be a commitment just to find the time to dream them up.
The coveted midnight “good luck” kiss can also make for a dismal start to the new year, particularly if you don’t get one. No one wants to be that person at a New Years Eve bash, dressed to the nines, staring down at their shoes at midnight because the invites happened to fall on an uneven number.
New Years Eve can be a tough one to negotiate, with the potential of huge build up and little pay off. It’s almost as if human consciousness collectively agreed (with no consultation from the science community) that midnight on the 31st of December each year would have the right alchemical properties to transform each and every one of us for the better. Only catch is you have to be it’s textbook cheerleader – ringing in the first of the first with the right cocktail of spirits and party people.
Lets face it, what we’re really gunning for here is just another chance to reset and refine. And a new beginning doesn't have to look like something you've seen before. We put so much heat on ourselves every other day of the year so let us allow this night of nights to be as unpredictable as its preceding twelve months, and the only pressures apparent in the necks of our champagne.
Happy New Year, onwards and upwards!
Originally published in The Murray Pioneer